S.H.O.D.D.Y. 40k (Cheap Sci-Fi Tank)

[Bearwoodman]

Small (but) riveting update:



My rivets are huge (although I think they fit ok with the massive slab-sided style of Astra Militarum armour design).  I intend to try some small ones made with glue.
 


I acquired some 40k spare "bits" from eBay so this SHODDY variant now has some close quarter anti-personnel capability.



My new bits also include an IG crew torso (but only one arm). More bodging required...

[vodkafan]

This whole concept is hilarious. Am looking forward to seeing what your mates do, meanwhile your BFG SP is looking great.

[Bearwoodman]

Thanks Vodkafan, very kind of you! Not sure exactly what my mates are up to, but my spies tell me that at least one intact vehicle has fallen into the hands of a lessor-know but particularly malevolent Necron Overlord (Bearwoodman Junior) who was this very afternoon working up designs for sponsons for some surplus Tesla Carbines he had lying about his stasis crypt. I warned him not to overload the SHODDY's suspension and pointed out that even a robotic SHODDY made from living metal will still have an underpowered drive train, but I don't think he was listening.

[Bearwoodman]

I have continued to add bits to the SHODDY SPG, including some milliput sandbags, (a popular addition in the field once crews realised how thick the standard armour actually was).

The lack of arms for my new GW Imperial Guard tank commander torso was solved by a donation from a Gripping Beast Arab infantryman, including (power) sword. The arms are a little less heroically proportioned than the head and body, but this is actually a characteristic common to many recruits from this battery's home system (something to do with the air quality on the hive worlds) and it is even considered an advantage for tank crews operating in confined spaces to have slightly shorter limbs than average.

I suppose I ought to paint it now. What do we think; dour Imperial grey, or some special garish camouflage for some bizarre alien world?

[Ultravanillasmurf]

Very nice.

[vodkafan]

  Can't wait to see it painted, don't want to affect the flow of your wonderful imagination by suggesting colours though.

[leadboy]

Great to see! One vote for garish 3 colour camouflage!

[Bearwoodman]

Ultravanillasmurf - thanks very much!

Vodkafan - cheers! No pressure then!

Leadboy - glad you are enjoying it so far. The vehicle is in the paint shop now. It will be three colours and my inspiration will be more "Imperial Guard" than "Astra Militarum". I will show you when it done.

Meanwhile...

[Blackwolf]

That’s brilliant,however I have one problem with it; the barrel isn’t big enough 

[Bearwoodman]

"What is this?" the Overlord barked at the private standing guard in front of an unfamiliar human vehicle. His metallic rasp was tinged with curiosity.
"Not sure, Sir.  The humans left it when they evacuated, Sir."
"Intact?"
"Yes Sir! The humans destroyed all the other vehicles they could not take with them. They blew up three Landraiders that were being repaired in that shed over there, Sir, and they have completely wrecked several Rhinos out the back. They even snapped in half the hover-skateboards the adolescent humans use to travel about on and annoy their parents. They do not appear to have bothered to try to destroy this tank, though, Sir."


"Interesting! I think we can use this vehicle. There is just one problem. Do you know what it is private?"
"Is it the armour, Sir? It's not as thick as it looks."
"No private, I don't think we need to worry about that. When we die we just come back to life again, don't we!"
"Yes, Sir. Is it the gun, Sir? It is not very accurate."
"I would not worry about gun accuracy if I were you, private! Remember, we are Science Fiction baddies!"
"If you say so, Sir. Mobility then Sir?  It is rather underpowered."
"No, that's not it at all, man!  If it cannot keep up with the advance, the driver can put it in neutral and I'll have Jones's section push it along.  Those chaps look as though they could do with the exercise. No. The problem is that it looks too much like a tank, and not enough like a robot version of something that has scuttled out of an ancient Egyptian tomb.  Not the correct idiom, you see.  Needs to look a bit more like those fellows over there." The Overlord waved his hand vaguely in the direction of a Squadron of Triarch Stalkers that were clanking past.
"Sir, you want us to make this tank look like a metal creepy-crawlie, Sir?"
"Precisely, private! See to it.  And remember, if you do manage modifications that embody the Necron vehicle design vernacular, there could be a stripe in it for you!"


"Yes, Sir.  Very good, Sir."
The Overlord strode away, feeling pleased with himself.

[Ultravanillasmurf]

Very good.

[Daeothar]

A shoddy Necron vehicle?

I'll grab the popcorn and easy chair; this is going to be... interesting...

[Bearwoodman]

Prototype SHODDY (Necron) Variant A:

[Bearwoodman]

"Stand easy men, just popping in to check on progress. Well?"
"Sir. We was up all night putting it together, Sir. We haven't been able to do much about the armour, Sir, and the new weapons are only small arms as that's what we had lying about, Sir, and the tail if anything puts more stress on the chassis than the old turret did, but hopefully it has got the look you was after, Sir."
"Yes, yes I see what you mean, Corporal. Excellent work indeed! Very Necron."
"Me and the lads thought we could call it "Scorpion", Sir."
"Scorpion eh? Well, no that won't do at all I'm afraid."
"No, Sir? We built a tail and everything!"
"There already was a tank called Scorpion, and it had thin armour and a weak gun, nothing like this mighty vehicle. Unhelpful connotations."
"Yes, Sir" said the Corporal, doubtfully.
"Dammit man, we are still mopping up stragglers in the underhive, Imperial Guard units are mobilising in the next system, and we have intercepted signals indicating that a detachment of the Emperor's Nephews are heading this way. I do not need humanity's IP lawyers joining the attack too!  There must be another Arachnid species that has not previously been used for armoured vehicles?"
"Er... Solifuge, Sir? Saw one on holiday once, didn't half make the missus jump!"
"The Solifuge Mark I? Yes I don't think that one's been taken..."


"But it doesn't even have a tail!"

[Ultravanillasmurf]

You need Nick Briggs to narrate this.