What's a vampire to do...

[Operator5]

...when the landlord puts your castle on the market?

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap_travel/20070702/ap_tr_ge/travel_brief_dracula_s_castle

 ::

[Mo]

I'd like to own a castle, but I'm saving for an IPhone...

Marc

[Westfalia Chris]

Hmmmm... now that´s a tough decision, getting an embodiment of pure, unadulterated cruelty and evil, or buying Castle Dracula.

Couldn´t make the choice myself.

[Hammers]

I don't know if you good ladies and gentlemen have read "The Historian" but if anything in it is true, the Count could be laying in lit de parade in there somewhere wishing for any american buyer to "come and get it..."

[Malamute]

I have already submitted my bid. However I don't think I will be successful.  Perhaps you guys could club together and lend me a few quid?  ::
After all as the Prince of Darkness I need a suitable home ::

[Plynkes]

Interviewing cringing minions to run the place for you will be the worst part.


You just can't find folks who know how to open a squeaky door very slowly and go "Yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhsssssssssssssssssss?" properly these days.

[Hammers]

...and soo hard to find good help with that proper squint.

[Operator5]

With the advent of plastic and orthopedic surgery all the good hunchbacks are walking straight and taking modelling jobs. Do you know how tough it will be to find a good bumbling assistant?

[revford]

Do you know how tough it will be to find a good bumbling assistant?

I think I could qualify for that kinda work.  I even walk with a limp so could do the 'walk this way' shtick.  

[Malamute]

Rev - You're hired  Do you look like Peter Lorre or Marty Feldman, it would be a bonus ::

[revford]

Rev - You're hired  Do you look like Peter Lorre or Marty Feldman, it would be a bonus ::

More Marty, Peter is a bit of a pretty boy compared to me.   ::