*
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
March 28, 2024, 07:06:20 PM

Login with username, password and session length

Donate

We Appreciate Your Support

Recent

Author Topic: "Never trust anyone on the Frontier" an ...epic NWF Campaign  (Read 96041 times)

Offline CPT Shanks

  • Scientist
  • Posts: 275
Re: "Never trust anyone on the Frontier" an ...epic NWF Campaign
« Reply #135 on: July 24, 2021, 05:28:47 AM »
Despatches Abbottabad (Forward) 17 July 1890
Oghi Fort, Agror Valley
Marched two days from Abbottabad without incident and established cantonment north of Oghi Fort.  Garrison commander COL Smyth-Jones Abbsent, 5th Ghurkas, reports pashtuns north of the border at Takot and Mazrai and along the Nandahar River have been conducting shuras. His reports from khans in Argror valley state Sikander Khan has declared jihad on the Britishers and has sworn to drive us from Torghar, the Black Mountains.
We will embark to the north, establish a staging area at Dilbori. From there I will split field force into two columns, by brigade, and conduct recces of the passes to cross the border and conduct punitive actions against villages found to be supporting Sikander Khan.  We will also establish heliograph stations to increase our ability to signal throughout the Black Mountains and back to Abbottabad.
Respectfully
BG Channers
« Last Edit: July 24, 2021, 05:30:37 AM by CPT Shanks »
"welcome to the world of cascading failure"


Offline giorgio

  • Scientist
  • Posts: 356
Re: "Never trust anyone on the Frontier" an ...epic NWF Campaign
« Reply #136 on: July 24, 2021, 02:06:30 PM »
Wana July 17th
Sir I respectfully send to you the summary of the letter  that the bandit Mulehead sent to Sikander Khan to Black Mountain.The relevant message was about risks of tribes raising in the North.
Hereafter the summary of the letter of the bandit obtained by our spy activities, bribing some waziris in the night caravan campfire. This new emerging bandit in the Black Mountain seems to be very ruthless and blood-lust;  for your due information and necessary actions.
Humble servant   Tanas Singh, Subedar 2 Sikh company of Guides PFF

Sikander Khan delighted son, follower of the True Book, you are not a treacherous jackall ready to bow to Ferignhi like the heretic followers of the corrupted rule that once gave its poisoned lessons all over from Peshawar to Tennessee. Now I, humble mullah of El Osprey, declare that only one is THE TRUE BOOK, coloured and full of humour. Dead to Kafiri, get your jezail, sharp your tulwar, destroy all Angrez armies, march to Swat and call a shura to convert all tribes in the Swat, starting from Yusufzais of the treacherous villain Malar Mansur Khan. After killing the Mad of Swat all his puppets like Umra and Ali Razza will come wagging their tail like little dogs and my tulwar will be ready to receive them. All glory and blessing to the only Rule, and to his mullah the invincible Mulehead true khan from Kabul to Dheli!

Offline Umra Khan

  • Scientist
  • Posts: 306
Re: "Never trust anyone on the Frontier" an ...epic NWF Campaign
« Reply #137 on: July 24, 2021, 02:41:38 PM »
there is an old tradition in Umra's family ... Umra's grandfather stole Jezails from Mulehead's grandfather ......


....Umra's father stole Jezails from Mulehead' father....

And Umra steal Jeazils from Mulehead, just to keep alive the tradition....
« Last Edit: July 27, 2021, 12:01:36 PM by Umra Khan »

Offline giorgio

  • Scientist
  • Posts: 356
Re: "Never trust anyone on the Frontier" an ...epic NWF Campaign
« Reply #138 on: July 24, 2021, 04:43:39 PM »
Waziri tradition...
Grandpa camels, Father mule train, my future acquisitions... 100% from Afridis,,, with Umra's compliments!

Offline Umra Khan

  • Scientist
  • Posts: 306
Re: "Never trust anyone on the Frontier" an ...epic NWF Campaign
« Reply #139 on: July 24, 2021, 08:23:29 PM »
On the evening of the 17th July at the HQ of Gen. Bindon Blood in Rawalpindi  a strange message arrives from the outpost of Chitral, rebounded by the fort of Chakdara .... "I'm Colonel Dano McGurule we are under a ......"   then the message stops ...
Gen. Blood does not see clearly and summons his intelligence specialists, who after a long meeting come to the conclusion that at the moment of the interruption of the message Col McGurule wanted to write a word that began with the letter A ....now the problem is ... what word did McGurule want to write?

"Apple "shout the General. That stupid Dano disturb me to inform that he is under an apple tree, damn stupid!

Sir if you allw me I  think he is meaning is under...a constant invitation to some jirgas says his chef de etat major......

No no says  the Colonel Durrie , he meant is under something more dangerous .....a blazing sun...I'm sure it is !

Unquote:
Seriously ... after  the parody of Carry Up On the Khyber...
Chitral garrison is under attack !
...says Colour Sergeant Victor "Scar"  Plumbers
« Last Edit: July 24, 2021, 08:40:15 PM by Umra Khan »

Offline Mad Guru

  • Mad Scientist
  • Posts: 711
    • Maiwand Day blog
Re: "Never trust anyone on the Frontier" an ...epic NWF Campaign
« Reply #140 on: July 25, 2021, 10:36:15 PM »
We present a series of Colored Lithographs from the sketches of Peshawar Tribune Special Correspondent & War Artist Extradorinaire, Reginald Winkie -- dated JULY 16, 1890 -- portraying the departure of 1st Brigade of the Peshawar Division for Dargai, under command of Brigadier Stewart Ruff-Husband...

View from the parapets of the walled city, with advance pickets of 9th Gurkhas, followed by column of 2/23rd Sikh Pioneers, 12th Bengal Cavalry, 17th Punjabis, No. 2. (Dejarat) Mt. Battery, and baggage train exiting through the Kabuli Darwaza (Kabul Gate):





NOTE TO READERS: Amongst the devoted adherents to TSATF observing departure of 1st Brigade is Captain Alexander "Teetotaler" Crane, Political Officer for the Peshawar Division, rumored to be not so happy with some of General Whitsend's recent decisions...



Brigadier Ruff-Husband observes the advance of his brigade, accompanied by his Adjutant, Brevet Major Tom:







9th Gurkhas "crown the heights" ahead of 2/23rd Sikh Pioneers:





Containing the ruckus on the road:











No. 2 (Dejarat) Mt. Battery packed up on its trusty (Old Glorious) mules...



Streaming out the Kabul Gate:









Major General Basil "Smokey" Whitsend himself huzzahs his 1st Brigade as they march off to Dargai...



92nd Highlanders bring up the rear AKA: "Our Steadfast Skirted Anchors":





Godspeed brothers & fare-thee-well:





« Last Edit: August 01, 2021, 10:01:57 PM by Mad Guru »
"We shall see what wisdom lies beneath my madness!"

Offline Mad Guru

  • Mad Scientist
  • Posts: 711
    • Maiwand Day blog
Re: "Never trust anyone on the Frontier" an ...epic NWF Campaign
« Reply #141 on: July 25, 2021, 11:10:12 PM »
FROM: Captain A. Crane, Political Officer, Peshawar Division
TO:     Maj. Gnl. Whitsend, CO, Peshawar Division
CC:     Lt. Gnl. Sir Bindon Blood, C-in-C Rawalpindi

General,

As you will see from the attached materials, the advance of Peshawar's 1st Brigade is being closely monitored by Tribal lookouts. If said lookouts are loyal to Malak Mansur Khan, ruler of the Yusufzais, who pledges loyalty to the Queen Empress -- or followers of Sarban Khan, Mansur's deputy, who is more aggressively inclined with regard to the Raj, I regret I cannot as yet say.  But I strongly recommend proceeding with utmost caution.

Respectfully Yours,

A. Crane, Capt, P.D.














« Last Edit: July 29, 2021, 08:24:42 PM by Mad Guru »

Offline Mad Guru

  • Mad Scientist
  • Posts: 711
    • Maiwand Day blog
Re: "Never trust anyone on the Frontier" an ...epic NWF Campaign
« Reply #142 on: July 25, 2021, 11:40:23 PM »
FROM: Mayank Jan, True Son & Loyal Devotee of Sarban Khan
TO:     Sarban Khan, Light of the Yusufzais, Defender of the Faithful, Enemy of Infidels
DATE: July 17, 1890   Dhu al-Qadah 28, 1307 per the Calendar of the Faithful

After half their army marched off to Dargai, the British kicked all the merchants, tradesmen, servants & beggars out of Peshawar!  I stayed behind and hid to see what developed.  Indeed, it did cause some disputation, and one fellow did refused to depart.  I was ready to draw the tulwar hidden in my pajamas, leap down and support him -- but then he succumbed to the harangue of the British and sadly no blood was spilt.  It seems even if they are Pashtun by blood, a brief time spent here in the big city reduces a man's Baraka to the barest of minimums, less than that of a eunuch.  Still, it has left a bad taste in the mouths of the locals, most of whom have relocated to one of the surrounding villages, where I have begun to parlay with them.  Needless to say, they are all followers of the True Faith and Loyal to the One True Book of Rules, TSATF, which is surely a sign pointing to victory...









« Last Edit: July 26, 2021, 09:22:53 AM by Mad Guru »

Offline Mad Guru

  • Mad Scientist
  • Posts: 711
    • Maiwand Day blog
Re: "Never trust anyone on the Frontier" an ...epic NWF Campaign
« Reply #143 on: July 26, 2021, 10:48:45 AM »
FROM: Sgt. Oliver Crood, York & Lancs, Acting Commander Chakdara Outpost
TO:     Higher Echelons Concerned
RE:     Status Report

DATE: July 17, 1890

I am sad to report Lt. Fitzroy's sufferings continue unabated.  He remains laid up, but the men and I are trying our best to keep him from expiring.  I have assigned Corporal Golightly, who prior to an attempted desertion during his first enlistment served as a stretcher-bearer with the Hospital Corps, to take the lead in caring for him, which he has done despite suffering from a severe tooth abscess himself.  When it rains it pours, even in this dry dusty mercilessly hot country.

Around midday today something odd happened that I had not seen during my prior six months manning this post: a shepherd drove his flock across the bridge.  It is my understanding that as a rule the locals have avoided using this bridge since our outpost was stood up.  But this shepherd drove on by.  Along the way his dog moved precipitously towards us, and Private Hudson -- who hates all animals -- raised his rifle and nearly shot it dead.  Luckily I was able to prevent him from firing, as trained herding dogs are reckoned to be worth their weight in gold or gunpowder hereabouts.  The shepherd called himself Azeem & professed true devotion to TSATF, but I sent him on his way in no uncertain terms nonetheless.  I then was much surprised at his amiable demeanor.  In fact he walked off most cheerfully, professing endless blessings upon us and our sickly young headman (how the bloody hell did he know about that?!), which I confess has left me with a sense of dire dread and foreboding -- a grand term I once heard from our Chaplain, when it became known that the Colonel-in-Chief of the regiment was keeping a second wife and family in Mysore.  I don't know what tomorrow will bring, but I have given orders for the entire garrison to stand to tonight, as I don't want us caught with our trousers down.  Pray for us & we shall do the same for our subaltern.

Yours Truly,

Sgt. O. Crood Regt. # 201

THE OUTPOST AT CHAKDARA



Lt. Fitzroy attended to by Corporal Golightly





The Bridge over the Swat River



The coming of the Sheep





Shepherd Azeem & his hound, Kuch









A conflagration averted





Pvt. Hudson reprimanded



No sleep for the weary at Chakdara

« Last Edit: July 31, 2021, 07:30:25 AM by Mad Guru »

Offline Umra Khan

  • Scientist
  • Posts: 306
Re: "Never trust anyone on the Frontier" an ...epic NWF Campaign
« Reply #144 on: July 26, 2021, 12:42:32 PM »
Rawalpindi 18th July 1890
In the  HQ of Lt. Gen. Bindon Blood a meeting with his Staff is underway,


someone tries to join the meeting.....


the situation in the North is this, says the General:


Gen McGuinness and his brigades arrived in Jalala then he will proceed to Dargai, Malakand, Chackdara , further in his route Janbatai pass, Dir , Lowarai pass , Kila Drosh and finally Chitral. is a long and difficult road, speed is essential, hoping that the tribes along the way do not create problems, this long journey could take between 20 to 30 days. His duty to relief the garrison in Chitral fort ,  overule the Khans Ali Razah Khan and Jhaba Khan.
With the Gen. McGuinness is a talented and experienced political officer , LT Reginald Ethan; his task is to depose the regent khan and appoint in his place the son of the previous Amir , Shuija Ul Mulk, a young boy who studied in India and of open and modern mentality.


Gen. Whitsend has arrived in Nowshera with his brigades and will depart soon north to Chakdara via Mardan, Jalala, Dargai and final step Malakand and then crossing the river to Chakdara ; his duty to establish a belt between Chakdara, Dir and the Bajaur, both to protect the road and the return of McGuinness's brigades, and to keep under control the tribes of the Mamunds, Yusufzais and Swatis, against whom he will be able to carry out punitive expeditions if he deems it appropriate.;

Yesterday we received the broken message from Chitral, and now we know that the garrison is under seige.
We though that the garrison has supplies for about 20 days, and enough ammunition to repulse a couple of assaults from the tribesmen.

Gen. Channer who was in Oghi yesterday, should continue to the north towards Thakot; I'm waiting some communications from him at any time.

Our friend Umra Khan is informing us of the various movements and conspiracies of khans , he is a reliable and honest person and a safe and faithful ally in the common belief TSATF.

Furthermore in the south Waziristan the truculent Malicious Wazir El Giorgio is traveling by mule to one of his residences in Al Tuscan in the El Chianj hills....probably to conclude some shady mule traffic.

Well Sirs, in the cabinet there is some good cognac of monsieur  Etienne Gasqueton which I brought from my last trip to England , it's time to have some rest .
God Save The Queen !

« Last Edit: July 26, 2021, 04:40:39 PM by Umra Khan »

Offline Umra Khan

  • Scientist
  • Posts: 306
Re: "Never trust anyone on the Frontier" an ...epic NWF Campaign
« Reply #145 on: July 26, 2021, 01:24:18 PM »
Umra Khan in his stronghold  of Mogala is in conversation with Percival Donald Mc Duck , Scottish representative of Guns and Guns of  Edinburgh ... in his hand he has a brochure of the company with the prices of some free consumption items ... 1 Maxim machine gun at 3,700 rupees and revolvers at 34 rupees each., rifles at 100 rupees each...
Now is the problem... where to fix all that money ?
Umra has 2 options... rob as usual the unwary Waziro of mules and camels and sell everything at the market of Ambala, or kidnap some rich Hindu down in Peshawar ... then he has another idea... return to his native village of Munda on the Jandol River in his green and fertile Bajaur and talk to his friend Malak Mansur Khan the champion of the true faith , the Nawab of Dir , the Wali  of  SWAT , the man who could change the 1 in 6 ....
 ...Umra has a proposal  that Malak Mansur  will not be able to refuse.


Umra , with its continuous change of appearance for not being recognized,.... spoke with Mr Percival Donald Mc Duck and his escort of gurkha mercenary.

I'll buy 1 maxim with enough ammunition to shoot all the stars , 200 revolvers,,,and 1000 Lee Metford in the .303 brit. caliber that I have seen kill a foe at 1.000 yards...says Umra...within 1 month I 'll have the money.
Came here confident Mr Mc Duck....and in the meantime he touch the hilt of his chora.
and with a deep smile greets the Scotsman ... Umra laughs thinking that the first target of his new Maxim will be the waziro  lol lol lol


« Last Edit: July 27, 2021, 08:26:56 AM by Umra Khan »

Offline CPT Shanks

  • Scientist
  • Posts: 275
Re: "Never trust anyone on the Frontier" an ...epic NWF Campaign
« Reply #146 on: July 26, 2021, 10:00:38 PM »
Despatches Abbottabad (Forward) 19 July 1890
Dilbori Cantonment, Agror Valley
To: General BBlood
From: Tako Field Force
Established cantonment area in the vicinity of Dilbori. The local Agror tribes are congenial enough and have already established a bazaar and the commissariat has purchased enough goats and naan to feed the force for two weeks.
I ordered COL Sym to establish a route via the Chitabat heights. This route proved untenable for the pack mules so he returned them to Dilbori while advancing on to Kopra.   COL O'Grady has taken them over the Jal Pass and through the Tikari Valley with orders to reconsolidate the column at Maidan. We will advance on Takot once the brigade has been reconstituted with all guns and supplies.
Heliograph station at Pailam has reported locals have been approaching the block house asking for water and demanding tributes for use of the land.
Respectfully
BG Channers

Offline giorgio

  • Scientist
  • Posts: 356
Re: "Never trust anyone on the Frontier" an ...epic NWF Campaign
« Reply #147 on: July 27, 2021, 05:14:25 PM »
Wana July 19th
Sir I respectfully send to you the summary of the letter  that the bandit Mulehead sent to Sikander Khan to Black Mountain.The relevant message was about attacking our columns.
Hereafter the summary of the letter of the bandit obtained by our spy activities, although still hidden in the roof of Mulehead’s  tower; for your due information and necessary actions.
Humble servant   Tanas Singh, Subedar 2 Sikh company of Guides PFF

Sikander Khan delighted son, follower of the True Book, I, humble mullah of El Osprey have been informed that a feringhee column has been detached from the main army. I order that you  get your jezail, sharp your tulwar, destroy all Angrez  and destroy all the block houses they are setting in the area. Use this important information to loot mules and rifles. All glory and blessing to the only Rule, and to his mullah the invincible Mulehead true khan from Indus to Lahore!
« Last Edit: July 27, 2021, 07:12:08 PM by giorgio »

Offline CPT Shanks

  • Scientist
  • Posts: 275
Re: "Never trust anyone on the Frontier" an ...epic NWF Campaign
« Reply #148 on: July 27, 2021, 09:00:35 PM »
To the Mighty Mulehead from whom wisdom flows like life from the Indus, Gem of the mountains from Delhi to Herat, provider for widows and orphans, Defender of the One True Rule The Book of Truths TMWWBK, Light in the valley of the forsaken, annointed leader of the sixteen.
The Angrez have foolishly divided their meager army as you foretold and now walk straight into the traps set for them. My ghazis will swarm down on them like lions set upon jackals  My jezzail are primed to smite the kafir as a hawk swoops down the valley on a dove. As to those kafir in the west that follow the old ways, the Yusufzais and their Bunerwhal allies, my scouts tell me even now a Britisher column moves to subjugate them after which my horsemen will ride down the valley and put to the tulwar all the TSATF kafirs who bow to the infidels. May your light continue to shine on sixes. Your humblest of followers, Sikander Khan. 17 Dhul Hijjah 1442

Offline Mad Guru

  • Mad Scientist
  • Posts: 711
    • Maiwand Day blog
Re: "Never trust anyone on the Frontier" an ...epic NWF Campaign
« Reply #149 on: July 28, 2021, 03:07:43 AM »
FROM: The Mad Guru of Swat
TO: Sikander Khan of Agror Valley
VIA: Hard Rock Courier

Oh yea of little faith -- that is to say, yea whose faith squeezes the wrong treatise.

When your words are read to me (long ago as a youngin I was blinded fighting the Infidels, so the written word must be read to me by my trusty khadim) I am torn like the people of Mecca in the early days of the Prophet, Peace And Blessings Be Upon Him -- when the dwellers of that city were split in two, with True Believers suffering persecution at the hands of former friends and relations who scoffed and attacked them.

Unlike them I am not torn between True Faith and False Idolatry, but between joy and hate.

I confess, Sikander Khan, when I hear these words of yours, a smile creeps across my leather face, for your words hold enormous entertainment value, such as gamers like you and I are given the chance to enjoy in this life for only fleeting moments in time.  Are these fleeting moments not joyful indeed?!?!

...but then I recall the Heathen nature of the False Word you swear your twisted devotion to, the Book of Lies sent to invade and conquer our small corner of the world by the Hegemonic Bird Book Publisher who already reigns supreme over the Earth (and who I alone have made rich via my purchase of dozens unto hundreds of their wares from childhood to this very day)... then my smile fades and I set my old blind face in stone.  The stone of hate.  The stone of WAR.  War for truth... war for tradition... war for the power of the simple word in black & white, not glossy full-color... and war against the dreaded MR. BABBAGE!

I pledge not to fall prey to the sweet mutterings, diverting as they may be, of you and those like you!

I shall redouble my efforts, I shall take the Green Standard of Mecca, that which Ayub Khan used to rally the Faithful, I shall take it from its cave of safe-keeping and carry it to Gilgit, to Chitral, to Jellalabad, to Peshawar, and raise the Mahallah!

Hear me now, ponder my words later, and forget me not tomorrow: in the name of the Mad Guru the Tribes shall rise, the Ghazis shall gather!

Will they fight the Farangi and their idol-worshipping lackeys from the South... or will they fight poor foolish neighbors like you, who fall prey to the siren song of the Mulehead, from whom darkness, lies, and perversion flow like honey from the beehive or money from the purses of the Memsahibs in Simla?

I am a Guru, not a soothsayer, but I predict this much: lead will be pushed, dice will be rolled, cards will be flipped, and victory gained -- all in the name of THE SWORD AND THE FLAME!

So let it be written, so let it be done, bang the gong, get it on!

With Blind Perseverance,

THE MAD GURU


* * * * *




HAMID: "Hey, Abdullah, do you know who that is?"



ABDULLAH: "The Mad Guru himself!"



HAMID: "And do you see what he carries in his hand...???"



ABDULLAH: "Can it be...???"



HAMID: "Yes it is -- the Green Standard of Mecca, which led the Faithful to victory ten years ago at Maiwand!"

ABDULLAH: "And then to defeat a month later at Kandahar AKA Baba Wali, no?"

HAMID: "Of course not!!!  The banner was gone long before that."

ABDULLAH "Okay, so... it leads to Victory every time?  Sweet!  Who does the Sainted Guru plan to defeat with it this time?"

HAMID: "That my friend is a question a child like the one guiding the blind Mad Guru's mule might ask, but not a childish question."

ABDULLAH: "So... no clue?"

HAMID: "It will be as God wills."
« Last Edit: August 01, 2021, 10:09:51 PM by Mad Guru »

 

Related Topics

  Subject / Started by Replies Last post
13 Replies
4619 Views
Last post April 25, 2011, 07:17:58 PM
by lfoster
13 Replies
3494 Views
Last post October 16, 2012, 11:10:31 AM
by Anatoli
0 Replies
1367 Views
Last post May 08, 2014, 04:27:01 PM
by MadWelshWizard
4 Replies
2975 Views
Last post August 21, 2014, 12:05:07 AM
by Barry S
5 Replies
2928 Views
Last post October 14, 2014, 04:55:44 AM
by john d law