Lestrade battles it out in the North. Recalled to the South (ahem!)

[Silbuster]

Lestrade of the Yard here. We’re still up in the wild and barbarous North. Just South of Watford. By heavens it’s cold up here. And the natives don’t seem to speak English. You ask them where the apple are pears are and they just look at you with their mouths open. I’ll be glad when we can return to England.
We were sitting around the camp fire swapping tales of jellied eels when the homing baboon (it’s a long story) arrived with a message. An ornithopter had been observed to drop several mysterious items in the Pathan village we’ve already had a barney or two in. We were to rendezvous with Captain Black, a Grey Hound of the British Secret Service, and recover said secret items before the Queen’s enemies could get a look-in.
“Right ho, lads, we’re off to that Pathan village again”, I shouted, “Look lively!”
There were comments made which I didn’t catch so I fired a shot into the air to warn them that they should speak up.
“Right ho, Sir!”, they cried, “We’re with you!”
I knew I could rely on them.

Terrain was rough on the way in. Posting WPC Sniper Sue on a large rise just outside the village, I asked if she could see anything odd.
“I reckon I can see the items Sarge. You can’t miss them. They look a lot like gigantic ten-sided dice.”
“Anything else?”
“Yes! The Country House Mob are racing in after them. I can see Captain Black too. He looks a bit lonely.”
Time to come up with a cunning plan.
“Charge!”, I cried.

Easier said than done. Given the packed terrain, it was more like forming an orderly queue at the double. As we finally started to find some space to fan out we found out the bad tidings. They were a lot faster than we were. Already latching onto the objectives, which did look like giant ten-sided dice, were their pygmy warriors. Although these all have short legs, given the speed at which they move, they must have three each. It’s just that the limbs move so fast that you can’t count them. Moving up to support these were the Country House minions; the bad butler, the criminal cook, the murderous maid and Flash Harry. People you can really trust! Finally, sneaking and slithering after them, came the ringleaders of these imps of iniquity. Hanging back while the menials and the expendables did their dirty work for them. What a joy it would be to bring these evil doers to justice. Or the wrong end of a truncheon. There he was, their leader Colonel Saunders and his Kentucky frying arc cannon. Next to him, the puppet Queen he intends to place on the throne. Though probably without the flame thrower she habitually carries. At the back, Smirking Poirot (Hercule’s evil twin) and his arc rifle and finally, the THING!. This hideous shape makes the pygmies look relatively attractive. Don’t get me wrong here; a warthog would look like Miss World next to this Medusa clone. If it had tried to join the Gorgons, it would have been turned down as too ugly by a long chalk. (But you can’t convince its owner of this, you know. I did consider recommending laser surgery or cataract removal but he’s already peering through the spectacles of hopeless optimism so there doesn’t seem much point…).
Anyway, with the nimble, ninja gnomes almost ready to carry their prizes back to the cauldron, I sent the boys in blue down the centre at a fair lick. Special Branch mostly took fire support positions on the right while Captain Black stretched his long limbs in a race down the right flank. The race was on. And we were never in it. The vertically challenged ones had already examined three secret items in the open, and found them to be real, before we were even in grabbing distance. We managed to seize several of them but they’re such slippery devils that they oozed out of our clutches and we were forced to chase them until we ran into the supporting minions. A fourth objective was in a ruined house where another oily oik found it be real as well. We surrounded the tiny terror but, once again, he slipped between our fingers. Size, it seems, does matter. Again he was pursued and we also ran into the Country House servants. A big fight ensued. Several of our brave men fell. Several rotters were also persuaded of the error of their ways. But, meanwhile, the objectives disappeared into the distance. Above the fight, Medusa’s ugly sister was examining yet another objective on the roof of a house in the company of yet another terror tot. A single shot ran out. You’ve guessed it. WPC Sniper Sue sent the witch back to hell. But the short one still grabbed the objective and made for safety. Five objectives down and only one up! Could Captain Black hold the remaining one on the old bridge. Not really, as it turned out to be the only fake. Worse still, 60 million volts surged through the air and Captain Black fell! However, we all know who Captain Black is in league with so it was no surprise when he sprang back to life the following turn. Not a man to annoy is Captain Black. He skirted two houses and then peeked around the corner at Colonel Saunders and his Kentucky frying arc cannon. The Captain fired first and fried the Colonel; chicken and all. Nice work Captain though it’s a mysteron to us how you do it.

As night fell, we were left in possession of the village and only one of six objectives. As I passed  around straws to see who was going to have the privilege of explaining it all to the superintendent, I reflected that it’s damn cold up in here in the far North. But it’s going to be damn hot down South.

Lestrade of the Yard.

P.S. We use dice as the scenario objectives. On reaching a dice, a player may throw it. If it rolls an even number, then the item is real; otherwise it is a fake. This means that one never knows which objectives will be real and how many real ones there will be.

P.P.S The first picture.
In the foreground, a rather rotten picture of WPC Sniper Sue keeping watch; way to her right, near the old bridge, DC Purgratroyd keeps watch too; way forwards is the man they are watching, Captain Black, a Grey Hound of the British Secret Service as he peeps in through a window. The bad butler leapt up with his shotgun when that happened. But the bad butler is no longer in the picture; or the window. Because, as you can see, WPC Sniper Sue has a direct line of sight to the window. Consequently, the bad butler is currently reclining on the floor behind the window. Permanently.

P.P.P.S A better picture of the action.
In the background, a pygmy and the murderous maid make away with an objective apiece. In the foreground, some officers mill about to no real purpose as their intended prey has legged it. Between the houses, the inspector and an officer attempt to arrest a pygmy. My those spears are sharp! The inspector is going to need two replacement officers before the tiny tot can be tranquillised. To their left, the criminal cook has failed to gun down Sergeant Redbeard. You might think that the cook is in danger from the sergeant and the special branch man in the ruined house. No chance. If you look very carefully, you will see a clear line of sight through a window and an empty empty door. A line of sight clear through the house. On the other end of which is WPC Sniper Sue. Exit cook.

P.P.P.P.S We use blue counters for moves of <3”, green for moves <6” and red for those running. Yellow counters are for those who have completed either their shooting or melee for that phase.