Breaking Bad (re Comrade Bolshy)

[H.M.Stanley]

TOP SECRET:

To ALL Agents East of Constantinople

The Red Army Commissar known as Nice Johnski ("Bolshy") is understood to be in disgrace*and had been placed under Garage Arrest by the Bolshevik High Command pending his execution and, subsequent (sic) trial.

Unsurprisingly, considering the state of the Party Official appointed for his defence, Comrade Scrivenskov, Bolshy has fled The Back of Beyond! Last seen heading towards Manchuri in search of the mythical Czar Tank in an Austin Pulitov AC toeing what is possibly the largest stockpile of superb and almost priceless Russian Vodka ever assembled and chased, we understand, by a troupe of aggrieved, erm, "actresses" all claiming Breach of Promise.

In a further disturbing twist the former British Army Officer Col. James Flashman O'Toole (retired) [a poltroon of the lowest order] is believed to now be in command of a large force of Bolshevik troops formerly loyal to Comrade Bolshy.

All agents in the vicinity must assemble in the Tashkent area and await further instructions.

THAT IS ALL

* Thought to be as result of a sabre dual with the renowned martial artist Count Gregorskpov. Apparently a sword pummel to the face and stamp on the nether regions trumps spinning roundhouse kick. Who would have thought it?

[John Grant]

Disgrace!  That is nothing short of a downright untruth.

I loaned the Czar Tank and the Vodka to Comrade Scivenskov on the very clear understanding that the Tank was his - if he could get it out of the mire - and the Vodka wasn't to be touched under any circumstance. The 'actresses' are nothing to do with me - they could be Q's.

'Til the rendezvous stay safe.

Bolshy  (ex)

[scrivs]

I agree it was the amorous adventures of the Inscrutable Q that caused all the trouble. Comrade Johnski was guilty of nothing more than a run of terrible fortune.

(Anyhow you can $%*!!!? if you think you will have me painting a new project, you already have had me painting ~200 SC figures this year)

[H.M.Stanley]

I agree it was the amorous adventures of the Inscrutable Q that caused all the trouble. Comrade Johnski was guilty of nothing more than a run of terrible fortune.

(Anyhow you can $%*!!!? if you think you will have me painting a new project, you already have had me painting ~200 SC figures this year)

My Dear Comrade Scrivs [.... smoothly]

No need to excite yourself old man. I have enough for all. And the Inscrutable "i've finally found a use for it" Q has Chinese Bandits i believe.

Now, about that Vodka of Bolshys.

Yours,

JFO'T

[Ignatieff]

Love it.........

[John Grant]

What do you mean "Love it"?

There were strict orders that no one should drink MY Vodka. If so much as a drop has been consumed I'm afraid a challenge will be issued forthwith and my champion  (  Col. James Flashman O'Toole (retired) ) will be presenting himself for satisfaction, well he will once I've told him to be there.

Leave the Vodka alone.

Bolshy (ex)

[H.M.Stanley]

"Ahh, i hear that you knew my Grandfather. Grumpy old B*gger, wasn't he? Still, he taught me everthing i know [chuckle]"

Toodle pip.

JFO'T

[koz10]

pending his execution and, subsequent (sic) trial.

Bloody typical for the Bolshsies - execute the man and then put him on trial.

toeing what is possibly the largest stockpile of superb and almost priceless Russian Vodka ever assembled

Toeing? You mean he's kicking it all the way? Don't execute him, sign him up for the local football (or soccer) team. That takes skill and courage!

[H.M.Stanley]

Bravo Sir!

A kindred spirit I see.

That's a rather lovely travelling companion you have there. Your fiancée, eh? Fancy a spot of cards, we could discuss her sleeping arrangements while we're at it. Only the one tent, and i have this rather dicky chest ...

Fondest wishes,

JFO'T