Would a Widow stay a widow??

[NickNascati]

All,
     I'm having a "discussion" with a friend of mine.  He is trying to write a short story around my "Massacre in Purgatory" AAR.  Part of his plot line is getting his hero together with the VERY recently widowed wife of the Marshall.  I said that in those days it would be very unusual for a widow to re-marry soon if at all.  What do you folks think?
                                                                             Nick

[Elbows]

In good and proper society with a family of means, I don't believe a wife would re-marry too often.  However, out in a town, far removed from family...I believe a woman would either hop on a train back home to the East or re-marry for support.  Short of turning a whore, she'd need some way to survive, unless her husband had been of considerable means.

In any case, without question it surely happened.  So the chance of it happening is moot for the points of him writing a story.  I say go for it.

[Cory]

Most women remarried rather quickly - I can think of examples of widows remarrying within the month without raising eyebrows. Regardless of social caste unless the widow inherited some money or productive land she and her children risked starvation and depredations. Remarrying was the socially accepted solution, especially in the west where the male female ratio tended to be lopsided.

Plus the town marshal might be more respected than a drunk, but it was rarely a well paying job and serving summons and a share of the fines might earn a few spare dollars, but there was no retirement and towns tended to not be forthcoming with the last wages. Hopping a train back east was expensive, that might cost five or six months of the husbands wages.

[starkadder]

Remarrying was the socially accepted solution, especially in the west where the male female ratio tended to be lopsided.

Exactly right, Cory. In a society that didn't have much in the way of women's protection or rights, remarriage was very common and often just for self-protection. The sweetener for any prospective suitor was also the acquisition of the woman's goods and chattels.

Romantic love was an option reserved for effete Easterners.